I look in the mirror constantly, look true oneself are what appearance. I also look at the eye of others constantly, I in considering others key point am what appearance.
我时常照镜子，看看真实的自己是什么样子。我也时常看着别人的眼睛，琢磨着别人眼中的我是什么样子。
Elementary school 6 years, my figure appears already the child ” that solidify became home of that “ others: Disposition is not crabbed too not gentle and quiet also, have result of become reconciled of good person predestined relationship, it is good helper of the teacher, when governing class discipline, be opposite the schoolgirl is a little prejudicial, chill to the schoolboy callosity.
小学六年，我的形象似乎已经固化成了那个“别人家的孩子”：性格不乖张也不过于文静，拥有好人缘和好成绩，是老师的好帮手，管理班级纪律时对女生有些偏心，对男生则冷漠无情。
In others or sincerity or belt some acid in praise, I want hard to live into that approximately perfect him —— in other eye more and more when general cleaning the first stay actively, enter into an election contest when class cadre the first stands up attend, the teacher agrees entirely when need help, give blackboard to announce the correct time the first each wishs to be in charge of, the birthday present that sends a friend also does not fall next ……
在别人或真心或带些酸味的夸赞中，我越来越努力地想活成他人眼中那个近乎完美的自己——大扫除时第一个主动留下，竞选班干部时第一个站起来参加，老师需要帮助时全部答应，出黑板报时第一个自愿负责，送朋友的生日礼物一个也不落下……
Gradually, I am overlooked unexpectedly, him life becomes a little painstaking, sensory pressure also is in distribute land increase.
渐渐地，我竟没注意到，自己生活变得有些辛苦，感觉压力也在一分一分地增加。
Eventually one day, the bowstring with “ Beng sober ——” was broken.
终于有一天，“嘣——”冷静的弦断了。
Origin is the thing with a sesame seed big bead nevertheless.
起因不过是件芝麻粒大的事儿。
On a self-study class, do not know what reason, my mood extreme difference; The pen in the hand cuts off the water supply all the time, more make me ineffable fire rises from the bottom of the heart. Very artful, hind desk jab jab I, extend come the palm, say: “ hey, you borrow me to raise a pen, my do not have water. ” I am impatient the pen in ground handle swings her; She looks at me surprisingly, collect the first stroke of a Chinese character then, immerse oneself in the operation that keeps her. My readjust good breath, take out another to reserve pen, preparation continues and exercise battle.
一节自习课上，不知道什么原因，我心情极差；手里的笔一直断水，更让我莫名火从心底起。好巧不巧，后桌戳戳我，伸来手掌，说道：“哎，你借我支笔呗，我的没水了。”我不耐烦地把手中的笔甩给她；她有些惊讶地看着我，接着捡起笔，埋头写她的作业。我重新调整好呼吸，拿出另一支备用笔，准备继续和作业开战。
How do this return “ cut off the water supply? You take a pen that cut off the water supply to give me, what do this calculate? A mutter to oneself is transmitted at the back of ” .
“这怎么还断水啊？你拿一支断水的笔给我，这算什么嘛？”后面传来一阵嘟囔。
Seem is being driven by what demon cuss —— wants to know, change previously I absolutely won't so the —— that do my face about, had grabbed the pen in her hand, drop: “ does not want to use do not use, it is good to become me really eleemosynary Bodhisattva! ” this word is exported, I regretted, but “ of the end up in my heart is defeated by a person to not be defeated by a ” banner long narrow flag, still be like this word close to growl ground spurt come out.
好似被什么魔咒驱使着——要知道，换作以前我绝不会这么做的——我转过身，抢过她手里的笔，丢下一句：“不想用就别用，真当我好施舍的菩萨啊！”这话一出口，我就后悔了，可是我心里竖着“输人不输阵”旗幡，还是把这话近乎吼似地迸了出来。
Hind the desk is abrupt be frightened by my this imposing manner, she ases if think I also won't get angry forever, was forced to say gingerlily: But “ is to lend me best ……” before you
后桌突然被我这气势吓住了，她仿佛认为我从来也永远不会发火，只好战战兢兢地说了一句：“可是你之前都是借我最好的……”
This her word makes me realize, I must make a change. If retroflexion at a draught now,can be, sure meeting lets everybody be mixed my hind feel unaccustomed like the desk uncomfortable, I must await an equal opportunity.
她的这句话令我意识到，我必须做出改变了。可是如果现在一下子翻转，必定会让所有人都和我的后桌一样感到不习惯不舒服，我得等待一个合适的机会。
The opportunity came very quickly. 6 grade, elementary school graduated, rise junior high, dim in everything is alluding my —— opportunity to come. Then, lending new learning school new fellow student of new class new teacher, I begin him change, let oneself become more true, more some more satisfied.
机会很快降临了。六年级，小学毕业了，升入初中，冥冥中一切都在暗示着我——机会来了。于是，借着新学校新班级新老师新同学，我开始改变自己，让自己变得更加真实，更加惬意些。
I still before class cadre, my achievement does not calculate difference as before, I can stay when general cleaning as before help, I still can display …… of a gift when friend birthday but I know, I had produced a lot of change. When seeing classmate of past elementary school again, they will be tongue-in-cheek like say: “ you changed a lot of ah! I listened to ” to just also laugh.
我依然当着班干部，我的成绩依旧不算差，我依旧会在大扫除时留下来帮忙，我仍然会在朋友生日时献上一份礼物……但我知道，我已经发生了许多变化。再见到过去小学同学时，他们会半开玩笑似的说：“你变了好多啊！”我听了也只是笑笑。
I think, I just am the model that became my to want to become, the look that in transforming people look, he wants stopped.
我想，我只不过是变成了自己想要成为的样子，改变了别人眼中他想要的样子罢了。