Hopeful, this word it accumulate contained a lot of meanings, making a line that uses Bai Juyi for example is: Of happy person happy, person Yi Le its are happy; The care of care person, person Yi You its care.
乐观，这词它蕴含了许多意思，打个比方用白居易的诗句就是：乐人之乐，人亦乐其乐；忧人之忧，人亦忧其忧。
In the elementary school career before the middle school on me, I ever was an undemonstrative child, no matter be to be before family member or stranger, very cabined, never speak with the person that does not know. I undemonstrative also very keen on face-saving, I and domestic person also reach consensus, outer not fierce I, it is informal to come home how. Even, rent a stuff with others, how I also must say from personal rehearse a long time, this may be kind of disease, myself also discovered, changed for ages, this is a lengthy process.
在我上中学之前的小学生涯中，我曾是个腼腆的孩子，不管是在亲人还是陌生人面前，都很拘束，从不与不认识的人讲话。腼腆的我也很要面子，我与家人也达成共识，在外不凶我，回家随便怎样。甚至，跟别人借东西，我也得自己排练半天如何去说，这可能是种病，我自己也发现了，改了好久，这是个漫长的过程。
When in remembering be in, learning, have second a classmate, those who cry is very sad, I also do not know how to start to talk, also do not know a reason, I know only blindly go comforting him, because his family member lived a life,I just am informed later is, I comfort him with my most hopeful one side, accordingly I and he became a good friend.
记得在中学的时候，有次一个同学，哭的很伤心，我也不知如何开口，也不知道原因，我只知道一味的去安慰他，后来我才得知是因为他家里人过了世，我用我最乐观的一面去安慰他，因此我和他成为了好朋友。
We two open his mind each other, after the secret that says oneself and dissatisfaction say us two feelings are very comfortable, we believe each other with respect to each other, so in the course of contacts, our parent is ripe also, also succeed between my Mom and his Mom for the good friend, shop to play together together. Such I summed up an experience, hopeful and OK penitentiary other.
我们俩互相敞开心扉，说自己的秘密和不满说完后我们俩感觉很舒服，我们就彼此相信彼此，就这么一来二去，我们的家长也就熟了，我妈和***之间也成功成为了好朋友，一起逛街一起玩。这样我总结了一个经验，乐观可以感化他人。
I hopeful also can help others, want to the classmate has a problem to come back to look for me only at the same time, I also am met actively goes helping, if be bagatelle, I am become the fatigue of raise one's hand, if be an important matter, I sit down together with respect to meeting and other discuss, I can go to the issue that everything can resolve those who solve. The advantage of hopeful freedom can let us help another person namely, common saying says well: “ gives person rose hand to leave lingering fragrance ” . Hopeful and OK remove all trouble, since me after thinking, classmates boast I, I say modestly is, think that classmate ah, it is him, thank you
乐观的我也能帮助别人，同时只要有同学有问题都回来找我，我也会积极地去帮助，如果是小事的话，我就当举手之劳了，如果是大事，我就会和他人一起坐下商量，凡事能解决的事我都会去解决的。乐观自由的好处就是可以让我们去帮助他人，俗话说得好：“赠人玫瑰手留余香”。乐观可以消除一切烦恼，自从我想开了后，同学们都夸我，我谦虚的说是，都以为那同学啊，是他，谢谢你
I hopeful also like to play together with the person that is happy to help a person very much, I also like the person like I and me very much.
乐观的我也非常喜欢与乐于助人的人一起玩，我也非常喜欢我和我一样的人。
The teacher feels, the author is clear without the consideration when writing this article with respect to begin to write or paint, “ hopeful ” and “ are happy to aid person ” is two different ideas, and the author has some of confuse sth with sth else, select material also is not very appropriate. What the article writes small class hour the 2nd paragraph is undemonstrative, but hind civil the reason that did not explain disposition change however, what turn suddenly into him depict is hopeful, exceedingly abrupt, and 2 words of “ hopeful ” did not pass specific example or the language will show come, float at the surface. Young writer is after the hope before begin to write or paint, must undertake conceiving, best can write an outline, such is in the ability in composing a process is unapt too cross deviate center, classmate, want to cheer!
老师觉得，作者在写这篇文章的时候没有考虑清楚就下笔了，“乐观”与“乐于助人”是两个不同的概念，而作者有些混为一谈了，选材也不是非常恰当。文章第二段写小学时的腼腆，但后文却没有交代性格转变的原因，突然转入描写自己的乐观，非常的突兀，且“乐观”二字没有通过具体的事例或者语言来表现出来，浮于表面。希望以后小作者在下笔之前，一定要进行构思，最好能写个提纲，这样在写作过程中才不至于太过偏离中心，同学，要加油啊！